I don’t like the Red Queen’s lips. And the show has horrible CGI. I could do better.

Well, I seem to be in slightly more of a pickle than usual. Due to a combination of the army running my husband and our car ragged on our own dime, the light bill spiking into the several hundreds, and other annoying factors my coffers are flat. I used to have money set aside for emergencies and taxes. I currently have a past due light bill and an empty bank account. In America, the army doesn’t pay you for work. You pay the army.

There have been a few generous donations from Heavenly Bride’s three readers. It should have been enough, but it barely kept the lights from being turned off. So here I sit in a pickle, and that pickle is about to play forth across the internet in a way I’d rather avoid.

My websites are in deep dooky.

I have to come up with the money to renew one in under 24 hours. (Edit: turns out I have a month on that one.) I have to come up with the money to renew Heavenly Bride’s site in about 3 or 4 days (edit) a week. And Akashik I think has a month left? (Edit, it also has a week.) I’ll have to double check to be sure. (See? I did.)

For years each time this matter came up, I would use the money I had earned from my own sweat and tears to do the trick. But the government has made sure I don’t have the money this time. I’m even afraid to buy food, and to top it off our internet bill is past due so what will the point be if I can’t pay that first?

The sadly ironic part here is that I’ve been toying with the idea of just letting the websites go down for a few months now. There’s no activity on them. The only way I know people go to them to read them – outside of the regular three people – is because someone mentioned in a Heavenly Bride review on Amazon that they were thrilled to learn they could read the book for free rather than buy it there. And, as recent events are making clear, I can’t afford the expense anymore.

So now the pinch has come and I’m looking at being forced to do it anyway. Aaaaaand… you know I don’t want to. I’m always afraid someone is waiting to swipe the domain name out from under me. Believe me, I had to fight to get that name.

And it’s only right. Three people donated to help out.

Despite all this drama I’ve been working extra hard on Heavenly Bride. I’ve reached a page in the story that required me to do a little preplanning. Characters had to be developed. Scenes had to be made. It’s more work than usual for a page, but I am hoping it will be worth it. The new creation methods I have been employing have been producing richer artwork that I hope people enjoy.

I’ve been posting sneak previews and wotnot in the Heavenly Bride pup forum. So far I have one pup in attendance, but hey! They say things to me on occasion. Woo hoo!

So on that note I shall get back to work. I’m doing this picture of Jiu Liu that’s going to make his haters hate him even more.

Whilst Waiting

Someday, I think to myself, 10 Confessions & A Kiss will be finished. Complete. Done. All of the books for sale at my respective distributors. And then, oh yes then, I shall put them up as a weekly webcomic. Which, I realize, means that each volume will need to have an extra side story within; content only those who purchase the comic can see.

I’m thinking this while impatiently waiting for a new panel to render. Aside from the holiday rush, work loading extra onto my plate due to the holiday rush, and other things that have forced me to ignore my own projects the comic is finally going smoothly now that I have settled on 3D technology as it’s means of production. My hands aren’t as tired, the art is more consistent, etc etc. panel6bHere, let me show you a render.

Of course the final panels look more black and white with toning, but this is my starting point.

So far so good: except things keep crashing on me since I got a new hard drive and reinstalled everything from scratch. Argh!

I got invited to attend Cyphacon this year. That was very thoughtful! I remember how well I was treated last year. So I stopped to seriously think about it…

…I’m still not going to go.

For me, there’s no point. It’s been a very bad year, with me hardly being able to create. I have nothing new to offer. And my heart just isn’t in it anymore. At least two regular attendees there created problems for me both at my home and while I was attending.  One problem I can avoid by simply not going. The other, well, the damage can never be undone. They weren’t the only factor in this thing that happened, but I remember how it came to a head and how… well. I can only sum it up with “you don’t tell a person with promise things that will encourage them to stop being productive. Especially when they’re not your child.” That’s the only way I can sum it up. And mind you I’m not blaming those people so much as still burning from the attitudes and, just, yeah. People can suck.

And as I mentioned before, one of my drives for attending the conventions was to find nifty things for my son. To bring my daughter along so she could see things and get out. I no longer have those matters to tend to. So. For me, it would just be a weekend of me smiling at a table, trapped into handling everything by myself while my husband runs around schmoozing and looking at everything, and it’s just too much of a drag anymore. So I think I’ll stay home and make comics. I enjoy making comics. One should choose what they enjoy.

I am considering Bayoucon, though: but only because I’ve lost that address from last year and I really want to deliver these art cards. LOL!

Still, it was very very nice of them to send me an invite. I’ve never been invited *back* to a convention before. I was flattered. If I had the money I’d go just to go and do my usual filming thing – avoiding those artists that have a cow over the free press of course. Oh snap!

So off I go back to work now that my program has crashed yet again… darn it.! I was on a roll too.